Thursday, March 31, 2011

"Who’s the Bigger Fake?"

I was sent a link to an article about the whole Xiaxue vs Peter Coffin thing. It was a pretty good read. I still think they are both royally fucked up. I also still think that Xiaxue is a beast that can't seem to survive without maximum insane drama life. I don't give two flying fucks if PC provoked it or not, XX has always been a vicious asshole.

I do agree with what umNO on GuruGossip had to say about it all:
"However Wendy invited people to go insult Peter on his twitter. No one here invites people to go harangue MP nor XX. We present our opinions and let people come up with their own conclusions. That is the main difference. Both MP and XX invite their followers to take action against people they've targeted. Lesson/medicine blah blah bleh whatever bullshit excuse they want to give it, once you call for action, you are using your online presence to bully. A fine line, but it is there."
Well said.

Oh, you wanted a picture? Here you go... (click to enlarge)

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

You've got somethin' on your teeth...

If you're new to the blog, read this before getting a big dick.

I didn't feel like posting anything today, but I wanted to get this shit up (the last part of it, really) in case the video is removed/hidden or if Michelle starts making excuses.

First, some of the shit that's been on her Facebook page recently... (As usual all images can be clicked to be enlarged.)

1. Posting links to your own old videos? Sorry, but it sounds like her AdSense isn't filling up fast enough, and she isn't inspired enough to make a new video.

2. I don't love Tidus nor Yuna. To me, FFX was the official starting point for the FF games going downhill. She already said in a video that she's been a fan since FFVII. The earlier FF games were pretty damn great, too. IV was epic, and VI was pretty damn perfect to me. Kefka... no one can kick his ass. I'm sorry, I just really fucking hate it when she pretends to be a fantard of stuff she could probably give a fuck less about.

Uh, no, he looks like he got a bad spray tan and is sick with a cold and in the middle of a sneeze due to allergies stirred up by that horrid wig.

Oh fuck, it's the return of the terrifying circle lenses.

1. I'm sure that quote is in some sort of self defense.

2. Oh, no, she's doing "favorites" videos now? And why the fuck is she making that face? Stop it. That face is never sexy. Ever.


ALSO: Someone told me she had lipstick/stain/whatever on her teeth in this video. I asked for screencaps, but none of them are super clear. It could be mistaken for a shadow. But I'll take their word for it.

But apparently several people think it is lipstick on her teeth...

Second comment, you are right. She needs to show proof of the damn donations. Other Youtube celebs are showing evidence (Bubzbeauty, NigaHiga, etc.). She's almost never made mention of what charities were receiving how much money unless she was partnered up (and most likely paid) to do it; like with the Lancome and St. Jude video.

I'm guessing the video will either a) mysteriously vanish or b) she'll be like "it's just a shadow, not lipstick, don't hate :))))))" Buh, fuck.

Not impressed with the winners...

So, I've been keeping up with the product ad contest Bubzbeauty posted about... not sure how long ago it was... Anyway, she announced there would be first, second, and third place winners, and seven runner ups. All of these people would get pretty sweet prize packages. I kept up with the entries out of curiosity of what people would do since the ads could be humorous and/or for nonexistent products.

I assumed the contest would have a few rules, like how long a video could be, how many people could participate, etc., but I don't believe that was the case. I also don't think that the entries were based too much on creativity. Here's the link to the "awards" video.

And now I'm gonna blab my opinion on all of the entries. If you don't like my opinion please hit the back button provided on your browser.

The seven runner-ups:

The Skittles stop motion ad: I actually really loved this one, but I am a sucker for stop motion animation. I've worked with stop motion for art classes, and it's a real pain in the ass. I know the girl worked hard, and I really think she should have placed in third at least. She worked with a camera, paper, pens, and Skittles to make a great video. Fuck yeah.

The 969 Printer ad: Good ad, really good. I think this one should have also been in the top three. But I could have lived without the making-out in the beginning. I just don't like seeing/hearing other people making out. Just a little peeve of mine. But it was a humorous ad with good acting.

iChoc ad: Bunch of girls in bright pants dancing. Okay. It wasn't bad, but it was too long. At least they looked like they were having fun.

Dove hair ad: This one wasn't bad, but it was boring. There was nothing original about it, nothing funny, nothing that jumped out at me. I really don't think it should have been a runner-up.

Robotic hand ad: Creative, humorous, wasn't super original but it was very well put together.

Nilum length & strength ad: Kind of up there with the Dove ad, but I liked it when she pulled on her hair and it just kept coming out (I know it was fake). Not bad.

Animal testing ad:
Nice animated ad, a good break from the other entries, but the concept has been done. A lot.

 And now for the top three...

3rd place was the Audio-technica: Assuming that person really did draw those images, damn good. It all flowed together wonderfully, and was convincing. I'm glad it won third place.

2nd place was the Rowing Boat Club: This was good, but I don't think it deserved to win second place. Why? It was pretty much a movie trailer, not a product ad. Didn't the original contest post state the entries should be for product ads? It wasn't bad at all, it was really impressive, but it was a fucking movie trailer.

Fun fact: Bubz is being asked to do a movie trailer contest. When she does I should post a fucking product ad video.

1st place was Smoking Kills: This has been done so many times I don't even... Great ad. But this person also had a bit of an unfair advantage. They seemed to be working with others that had extra experience in filming, and she was able to get a ton of people involved. Few entries had that advantage. And I'm getting tired of hearing Requiem for a Dream everyfuckingwhere. Beautiful piece, I love it, but it's been overused. Not saying the video was bad at all, but this person clearly had some advantages.

But here's what really pisses me off...

Klaire de Lys had a gorgeous entry. Given, I've never given a shit about perfume commercials. They're usually full of sex or the ocean (or both). They are the kinds of ads that you can't imagine what the hell it's for until it's over and a name flashes on the screen. However, Klaire's video was pretty damn awesome, and it's obvious she put work into it. She should have been in the runner-ups if nothing else. Shit, she should have gained a spot in the runner-ups over that Dove ad.

Can't please everyone. But dammit, Klaire should have been a runner-up.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Michelle's Twitter makes my brain melt

I don't use Twitter, and neither do the few people that contribute to these posts. But I've come to realize that if we did we'd be posting just about everything Michelle Tweets, because almost all of it is completely ass-backwards retarded. Her recent Tweets defending XX are sickening. I don't give a fuck about that Peter guy, XX has always been a massive bitch and continues to do so, even if she isn't provoked. Michelle defends her because she's just as bad. Some innocent Christian she is.

Click to enlarge...

The other tweets were just boring or flat out stupid...

I'm starting to think she's moving just so she'll have an excuse to buy more shit.

On a happier note:

You didn't post opinions, U MUST B A HATER!

If you are new to this blog, read this post before getting a big dick.

Chances are if you pay attention to this blog, you found it through the Michelle Phail Tumblr. And if that is the case, you probably have already seen, or will see, this post.

That poor Tumblr page seems to attract more vicious assholes than any other site, including this one. People come here with their undies in a knot for many reasons, may it be my swearing, calling Michelle a liar and heartless bitch, or even just because I don't fucking like her. But as I've said several times before, the Tumblr is straight up facts. No opinions. Yet the minions go there with "I can't believe people like you exist" and "you're stupid for hating Michelle" comments, as well as the normal list of insults.

It amuses me when someone makes a very foul and insulting comment then wraps it up with "spread the love" or "btw I'm not a fan of Michelle's". Yes you are, you just wrote a short essay defending her and calling everyone else assholes. Don't think you can throw that in there to save yourself from looking like a self-righteous dick.

Seriously, let's break this down:
The Tumblr showcases some crazy shit Michelle has done, such as sending her minions to bitch out a 16 year old on Twitter, posting a snide apology for the attack (much later), the heaps of lies about IQQU and the FDA, being an ass to other gurus, being an ass to her fans, sending her minions to attack what ended up being an innocent fan-page ran by a 13 year old fan on Facebook, and so much more. No opinions included. No trash-talk included. It's as straight-up honest as it gets.

Yet, people go to the Tumblr claiming the contributors are heartless, have no lives, must be fat, must be ugly, must be jealous, need to die, need to commit suicide, etc. and form such insults into a few paragraphs in an attempt to look smart and "right" while being rude and sometimes trying to make it personal. All over quotes and screencaps (some of which Michelle never deleted). The truth hurts, doesn't it?

Those people are blind minions. They probably haven't read a damn thing on the Tumblr, except for maybe entry titles, and all they know is that it disagrees with what they love, and they can't stand that. The only way they know to act is to be as rude as possible. Has that ever got them what they wanted out of life? Do they call their parents "stupid bitches" when they don't get a ride to the mall? I sure as hell hope not.

I can understand we all have at least one thing in our life we guard viciously to the point we are illogical. But a make-up guru on Youtube? That's what you're immaturely, and stupidly defending? She must not mean that much to you if you're okay with telling people that don't agree with you to go die. Seems like if you genuinely love something, you'd have a good head on your shoulders about it. But Michelle's "phans" reflect who she is; a very snide, money-hungry, deceptive person that hides behind God. And sometimes Photoshop.

Do I expect anyone to take this seriously? No, not really. But I like the Tumblr a lot. And I admire the contributors for not getting rudely opinionated, unlike myself. You can call me a hypocrite all you want. You can even tell me to kill myself if you want. You're just providing more evidence that Michelle is thrilled to have such horrible, nasty fans that are foul to the point they wish ill-will and death upon others.

Once again, I don't know how to end a post.

Have this:

Friday, March 25, 2011

An assortment of... I don't even know...

If you're new to this blog, read this post before getting a big dick.

I'm gonna try and post the random clutter before I get to the core of the post. Because I'm not solid on what's going on.

Oh, goody. I saw what this mess looks like, now I won't feel tempted to watch the crappy video for it.

Looks like every other tutorial she's ever done. She looks bored as shit. *yawn* Moving on...

1. Quality over quantity, you say? Stop trying to be a sneaky hater, Michelle. You lack both quality and quantity.

2. No. You don't need a fucking piano. You will never learn how to play it. It will it there and get no use other than appearing in the backgrounds of photos. And way to post one of the most popular piano pieces from the FF series. Some "nerd" you are. Play the old games, lazy. No, she'll just hire someone to play hem for her.

Now we get to the point where I don't know what's going on 100%. If you know what's going on, have links, screencaps, etc. please discuss in the comments.

I don't check XiaXue's blog. I can't stand seeing her overly photoshopped face, split ends, and bad cosmetic surgery. I can't stand her shitty-ass attitude and psycho-fuck fans. But apparently some guy named Peter (I think) gave her shit for whatever reason. He was hateful, racist, and when it was found out he faked having a girlfriend (making separate accounts pretending to be her), XX rose all hell and the death threats poured in. She seems to find it funny telling people to kill themselves. And Michelle heavily supports this behavior. We know this from the whole people need to get "raped" with a "bayonet" thing.

Anyway, Peter shouldn't have beat the wasps' nest. But XX, as usual, chose to me immature as fuck and wreak more havoc by talking about the guy killing himself and fully supporting her minions to encourage him to commit suicide. I'm a total bitch-tit, but I don't support death threats. I never will. It's not funny.

What came of that? This post by Bubz. If it isn't obvious by past posts, Bubz has my support. She's had far more severe hater issues than Michelle (trust me on that one, it would take too long to explain), but she always finds a classy way to deal with the bullshit. How does she manage? I'm not entirely sure. I guess because she has a real and enjoyable life. There is passion in her videos, she has her clothing line, she's working on a make-up brush line, and she just seems to enjoy life. Unlike rich, spoiled Michelle that does no real work and has no real friends; only people that ride her coattails. Even that won't last forever.

Anyway, some time after that post Michelle posted this steaming pile of fresh shit:

You can click that to enlarge it, btw. Michelle, I know you have stupid fans that think you're an innocent person, but I'm sure you are the only one that views yourself as holy. She totally reached up her own ass to pull out this shit. I don't think anyone said a goddamn word to her in regards to her supporting XX being a total bitch. Michelle wants drama in her life. Even if she has to bullshit to provoke the crap that already exists.
And, of course, she once again hides behind religion. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

Whatever, psycho.

And was this Tweet to Bubz REALLY CALLED FOR?

That comes off as malicious as hell. No shit stress causes wrinkles, you damn back-handed bitch. Lying your ass off and being a shit person will cause the karma fairy to give you some mean ass wrinkles later down the road, as well. Why don't you admit to being pissed with someone instead of playing the passive-aggressive I'm-not-really-mad-but-I-am card?

She wants to start more shit. She really does. There was no need, no need to Tweet that snide ass crap to Bubz.

I don't even know how to end this. Dammit all.

Ugh, no, let's try something cute...

Much, much better.


I was sent this and told that Bubz posted it on her page (click to enlarge)...

That is the nicest fucking thing I have read in a long time. This is the stuff Michelle pretends to live by and lies about. Disgusting. I'm glad Bubz isn't corrupt; I hope she never is.

Personal experiences with IQQU/ICKEWW

If you're new to the blog, read this post before getting a big dick.

If you are completely unaware of Michelle's IQQU bullshit, please check out this post about the sunscreen, as well as this post and this one about IQQU being FDA approved and her supposedly selling the company to someone else. As well as her lying about an "FDA Asia" existing. @__@ So much wrong with that.

I am ashamed to say I have tried IQQU products. Back when I used to like Michelle Phan, LOLrsk8s' cousin wanted to try the products, specifically the serum and rice scrub, but she didn't want to be the only one testing them. We agreed to try them out, too. The farthest we made it was a little over three months.

Why the fuck did we try that shit? We were like other blind fans, and thought, "Michelle has nice skin and she uses that stuff! We should use it, too!" Oh, dear lord, how stupid we were. For the record, this was still when IQQU was new, but it was after she discontinued some kind of cream (I believe it was) that had FUCKING PRESCRIPTION-GRADE RETINOL IN IT. If you don't know what retinol is, and what it's capable of at a prescription-grade level, look it up. That much retinol is not good for younger skin unless prescribed by a dermatologist. Which Michelle lied about being. Also, if you have any info on that discontinued product, let me know. I spoken to people that tried it, but there are no screencaps from the bickering about it.

Michelle claimed that acne was bound to get worse before it got better from the use of her serum. A lot of companies claim that. It was true for me when I started using Neutrogena, except my skin stayed clear and didn't go totally batshit. Everyone's skin is different, but that serum wreaked some crazy damage.

All three of us (LOLrsk8s, her cousin, and myself) used that crap as recommended. We did get whiteheads at first. They went away eventually, but not long after that we all got giant cysts all over our faces. Cysts hurt like a motherfucker. You would know if you've ever had even one.

One thing that most likely contributed to the cysts on LOLrsk8s and myself was probably the mineral oil in the rice scrub. Mineral oil isn't friendly with acne-prone skin. Should we have looked this up ourselves? Yes, yes we should have. But Michelle, as a make-up/skin/health guru, should have made note that mineral oil IS NOT friendly with acne-prone and sensitive skin. When she was questioned about it, she either ignored comments or deleted them. She did that will all concerned/unhappy customers. Typical. Negative (but fair) reviews still don't make it onto the site.

The big regret is that we didn't take photos of the damage done, because we were so embarrassed. In fact, I only know of one dissatisfied customer that had the lady-balls to take pictures of the damage. And recently she made a post in regard's to Michelle's suspicious shit since her original IQQU post still gets attention. I salute her for taking the photos. I wish we did the same.

 Well, that was a boring story...

Anyway, I don't buy that Michelle suddenly handed over IQQU to someone else. She already lied about her crap being FDA approved, lied about there being an FDA Asia, claimed to be meeting with the FDA then said nothing else about it; there was so much backpedaling and lying it's almost impossible to process.

Oh, and someone sent me this goodie:

In case you are confused: Both "apologize" and "apologise" are accepted in American and British English. "Apologize" is more common in American writing, and "apologise" is more common in British writing. But neither use two p's. Better fix that, since it's on the front page. Not saying it's the end of the world or anything.

 Sort of relevant:

Ina Garten done fucked up

This is not an MP related post.

Despite my vicious personality portrayed on this blog, I try not to immediately latch onto dramatic news, especially when it comes from TMZ. But, the recent updates about Ina Garten are hard to ignore.

My sister is was a fan of Ina, so I'm no stranger to her. Her books are okay, but I can't stand her personality on her show, and how all the ingredients have to be "good"... Like I was going to pick the shitty ones in the back of the pantry...

Anyway, according to this post on TMZ, Ina denied a young boy from the Make-A-Wish foundation his wish to cook with her not once, but twice. Freakin' TWICE. Supposedly, she couldn't do it the first time because of a book tour. Really, a fucking book tour? Lady, you haven't written any books that America is doing back-flips over. I doubt your tour was that busy.

No real reason was given for the second rejection to my knowledge, just this:
A rep for Garten tells us, "Despite her demanding schedule, [Ina] participates and helps as many organizations as she can throughout the year, helping children and adults like Enzo with life threatening and compromising illnesses.

The rep continues, "Unfortunately, as much as she would like to, it's absolutely impossible for her to grant every request she receives."

No offense to the kid, or anyone that wants to meet Ina, but I'm fairly certain very few people have a dying wish to meet this asshole. So, I'm sure she has some time to spare. Ina probably rarely gets requests for anything. She gets presented money to do shit to keep up with her expensive ass house and wardrobe of horrid denim shirts.

The Food Network Humor blog probably hit the nail on the head with reasons why Ina declined. There's a ton of "excuses" in the comments section of the blog, but I'm not buying a single damn one of them. Yeah, she does seem more comfortable around gay men, as opposed to straight men, other women, and kids. But that is no excuse. She probably doesn't like kids, which is still no excuse. But that aside, this comment sums the whole thing up for me:
"I will no longer be watching her show, supporting her cookbooks or watching anything that she is on. I refuse to support someone who can somehow find time to entertain celebrities but appears to be above making a wish come true for someone that truly deserves it."
 I do hope the story is false. Inaccurate if nothing else.

Ugh... No, just no...

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Random crap post

Read this before you make an ass of yourself.

This isn't going to be a super exciting post. Sorry.

What's wrong with this update?

Oh, Michelle, you wouldn't know guilt if it crawled up your ass and died. The fact that she pointed out how she doesn't "feel as guilty" is a red flag to me. I'm honestly shocked she hasn't done haul videos before. But since a lot of people see her for the greedy fuck she is, she probably figured she'd be giving them reason to bitch. I'm sorry, I don't care who does haul videos for charity, I think it's ungodly tacky. Make different videos.

I didn't watch that video, fyi. That creepy smile in the screen-still terrifies me.

And then there's this...

Michelle has already done videos for this kind of "look". I know some gurus like to recreate their most popular videos after a year or so when they've made personal improvements, and have better cameras and laptops to work with. But Michelle has recreated a lot of her old videos to the point it screams, "I HAVE NO IDEAS DUUUUUUUURRRRR!"

She's also wearing an outfit that is stereotypical office wear, but a lot of people that work in offices actually don't dress like that. At least not after a while. I'm sure there are a few girls that get balls to the wall pretty every single day, but the office workers I know do not.

I think she removed one of the videos where she did an office look. It involved some brush/comb combo that she got paid to advertise. She probably removed it because she loves blowing off the FTC as hard as she can.

So, within the same 24 hours that Michelle talked about uploading this shit, Bubz announced she uploaded an office look. And here's where a shit ton of comparison comments pour in. I bet money if they were not both Asian no one would compare them.

This comment in particular irked me:

1. Michelle Phan is not a professional. She didn't go to school for this. She got lucky on Youtube, and used Google for mild research for some of her videos.
2. She might as well be a robot. She's heartless. No offense to robots.
3. Class? IRL LOL.

I gotta agree with the Rebecca Black shit. A majority of the comments were related to her, and I can't stand that auto-tuned fail asshole. Who the fuck in their right mind funded that fucking music video?

Anyway, Bubz's video was okay. As I have said in a past post, I admire her, she seems real, she is classy about how she deals with haters, she admits her flaws, and I really like her comedy channel. I don't think her make-up skills, however, are too great. Specifically the way she applies eyeliner. It's always uneven and bumpy. But, yeah, she's still awesome.

This ended weirdly. Have this:

Thursday, March 17, 2011

It's not a bandwagon, Michelle.

Remember, you can click all images to enlarge them!

EDIT:  The Michelle Phail Tumblr already posted a link to this article, but I wanted to link it as well. I'm surprised Michelle herself hasn't made note of it so her "Phan-tards" would plague the page.
I've said it before and I will say it again: She obviously enjoys her fans being abusive, else she would take the time out of her not-so-busy life to make note of how fucking stupid they are acting.

Let's cover this shit first...

Photoshop sure is amazing, isn't it? No awkward body fat (I'm not saying she's fat), no pores, no scars, perfectly tamed hair... Those smiles are so fake they make my eye twitch. She gets way too fucking much undeserved recognition.

Now onto the point of the post...

 Personally, I like Bubz. I'm not nuts about her make-up tutorials, but I love her hair and nail tutorials, and I enjoy her comedy channel. She comes off as real and genuine, and she handles the few massive haters/stalkers she has very well. You know who I'm talking about; the people that impersonate her, claim she's a lesbian, claim her dog died, etc. 

Anyway, I caught most of her BlogTV appearances, and she was pretty damn awesome. Raising over $3,000 from that is fucking epic. I tip my hat to her and her fans that were kind enough to help make that happen. 

After I saw that update, I saw this one...

I started laughing so hard I couldn't breathe, nor make a sound. It's nice that Michelle is donating money, even if it is just for publicity and possibly cover up some shit she's done wrong, but oh good lord... You know she was probably butthurt as shit that her numbers were lower than Bubz's.

I figured she's do something else to raise money, and I knew it'd suck. She posted some video on her charity channel of shit happening. Just shit she was doing. No awareness, nothing special, just a clusterfuck.

Then she did this shit...

What the utter fuck is this garbage? I'm willing to say this is the most shit make-up job she's done to date. There is nothing special about this make-up. At. Fucking. All. The colors are poorly blended, it doesn't look like she took the time to get the shadow off of her eyelashes, and cherry blossoms? Really? You had to pick the most common fucking thing? Not even that, you picked it and insulted it's beauty.

And it looks like there is something wrong/different with her face. Like with her smile and cheeks. I guess it's the lack of photoshop...

No, seriously...
I don't have screencaps of this, so if someone has them PLEASE link them. I have been told that...

1.Bubz did her 24 hour BlogTV session in smaller sessions that were 4-6 hours long each. Damn, six hours... But she said she didn't run out of stuff to talk about, and all of her fans seemed pleased, so that's good. And what I saw of it, it was pretty entertaining and everyone seemed happy. Hooray for Bubz!

2. As you will see in the comments below...
Michelle is going to donate that $1,000 after the video reaches one million views. After.
What does that have to do with donating to Japan? Not a fucking thing.
I know a few Youtube partners personally, and they do indeed get much more than $1,000 for a video with one millions views, especially if they already have a ton of popular videos and a fuck ton of subscribers. Seems that Michelle wants to make up for the money she is donating by making several hundred more in it's place. She is so fucking selfish words cannot describe...

Donating to Japan isn't a fucking bandwagon, Michelle. Stop treating it like a contest.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

I fucking knew it.

Click to enlarge.

This might as well have said: "LOOK AT MY TITS. THERE IS A NECKLACE IN THERE. I I MADE SURE IT'D GO INTO MY CLEAVAGE SO YOU'D LOOK. Oh, yeah, donate to Japan!"

Why do those two other girls work with her? Seriously... Are they riding coat tails? They seem better than that, but they could be just as fucked up as Michelle for all I know.

I think I should start making videos for a worthy cause as well: Donate money to buy Michelle clothes that cover up her freaking cleavage. We get, Michelle, you think you're a skinny/curvy (depending on your mood) sexy fashionista. But wear some played down shit and cover up every now and again. Don't worry, we won't think you're poor.


I already made a post that made note of this, but I missed these two updates of hers, and both of them are shit. 

1. ( in regards to the bottom post) "But I'm still alive!" Why would you say that? Why? Are you trying to give us the impression you were in danger? Are you reminding us you were not a tsunami victim? Just... shut up, please.

2. (in regards to the top post) No, Michelle. God isn't trying to teach you that material things are not important. Your shit got stolen due to your own stupidity, God had nothing to do with that. It's the karma fairy telling you that karma is a bitch. 

You know, she doesn't seem too bothered by her shit being stolen. If I were her, I'd be worried about any personal shit on my laptop being found out, or my identity stolen or cards maxed out. Sure, there are steps you can take to prevent that, but there would still be massive paranoia. But that's just me. However, I believe she's lying, once again, to gain sympathy for whatever reason. She needs her e-dick sucked harder and harder every damn day.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Even during bad times, it's all about Michelle.


First, this shit right here (all images can be clicked to enlarge):

Michelle never, ever takes time to mention that lighting, angles, the the type of camera being used can contribute to how a person looks. I think her laying method is a load of shit. I have a few cousins that have tried it with different products. They all ended up getting clogged pores from all of the stuff used, most of it never made a difference despite a 4 month trial, and their skin ended up looking exhausted from having so much stuff piled on before bed. This might work for some people, but I doubt those people are all using such expensive serums, moisturizers, creams, etc. From what I have read and been told, the earliest a person should start using serums is their mid-twenties (correct me if I am wrong). And I believe that using wrinkle cream in your teens and early twenties is a solid waste of cash. Why are you fighting something that hasn't even begun to show up yet? "You want to prevent now." Then wear sun screen, drink water, and all the other shit you're told by gurus every single day.

I also believe she's been wearing some kind of foundation or tinted moisturizer in her recent videos, claiming to be bare skinned. Well, I believe that to be true for a lot of her videos. Because if her skin looks rough, at all, she's called out on it. And then when the next video rolls around, *gasp*, her skin look far more even and poreless. Sorry, but your skin can't read comments on Youtube and magically repair itself so quickly every damn time.

And shit, Michelle, would it kill you to buy some Chapstick? Or do you need to go buy a super expensive balm? That $20,000+ a month sure burns a hole in her pocket.

And how about her new bangs...

I thought those bangs were fake at first. I have no doubt she dyed her hair black to hide damage. She needs to go to a good hair dresser to get her split ends trimmed and advice on how to keep her hair healthy. Most of the time her hair looks like a Halloween wig because it appears so dry. BUY CONDITIONER. IT IS YOUR FRIEND. And bangs "make you look younger"? Since when? Michelle is all about looking young. She is going to shit herself the day she turns 30. Or 25.

Now onto something that gave my blog a fuck ton of traffic from the Michelle Phail Tumblr and made several people shit so many bricks they could have made a fort and bombed my ass:
Turns out the person that made the Michelle Phan fan page that got a lot of (negative) attention was a 13 year old female fan of Michelle's. She's handled all of the insults and threats very well, I must say. She has my respect. She hasn't taken down the page despite the bitching, and there is no reason for her to. Some of Michelle's intelligent fans began pointing out how fucking insane it got.

My argument still stands: Michelle enjoys that poor girl being bashed. Otherwise she'd take the time to make note of how fucking horrible it is for her fans to make paragraphs of "You must be really ugly show yourself", "poor shallow bitch you have no life", "go die" comments. Her fans told a 13 year old girl to go die. No surprise. They told a 16 year old on Twitter that harmlessly stated her opinion to go kill herself. I can't really be surprised by their fuckery anymore. And Michelle didn't give two flying fucks about the Twitter thing, either. She made a very half assed apology that came off as, "I did nothing wrong, you all took it too far, that girl is stupid, the end." Michelle just doesn't give a fuck.


It really irks me how Michelle brings up prayer, family, and friends when shit goes wrong, or when feels she needs sympathy to hide a previous fuck up only to create a bigger clusterfuck. I have nothing against prayer. I have something against people that seem to hide behind it.

But what's more irritating is how she had to state how she had a shit day. And not even just say, "I had a bad day but..." or this "This makes me think twice about my problems..." No. She had to mention specifics. She should have known better than to have left expensive ass make-up and a goddamned laptop from her fucking car. First of all, where the fuck are you going that you need a valet? Second, how could you not know this shit happens? It isn't rare. At all. That is your own fuck up, ma'am. Why did she mention that? Does she have a Paypal account that she's hoping people will pour money into? Mother fucker, you make $20,000 a month. Don't be a stupid whiny bitch just because you have money.

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad she mentioned donating to the Red Cross, it's something legit. It's horrible how people make fraud donation sites at such critical times. But having that been said, I won't be surprised if Michelle makes some half-assed video for her charity channel for this soon. The only videos that I recall her making being linked to charity sites were the ones for St. Jude via Lancome, and one for malaria (I don't remember which site she linked to). Other videos, well, we've never been told how much money is made, what charities they go to, nor when. And when asked, she pretends not to notice, and never answers.

And the only reason I can see her making a video for this is to remind everyone that she is Asian. Whoopteefuckingdoo. Feel sympathy for the victims, not the specific races. And if you don't give a shit, don't pretend to. This isn't a fucking bandwagon, Michelle. 

And she better get her shit straight if she does make a video. If anyone saw the malaria video, you probably saw a comment from someone that actually had malaria, POLITELY correcting Michelle on her inaccurate facts. Michelle responded very fucking rudely, as normal. You asshole, you have never had malaria, and you probably don't know anyone that has had malaria. So don't get a big dick just because you Googled malaria, pulled up the first link, and read 3-4 sentences on it.

I only hope that if she does make a video the money does go to a reputable charity. Or better: Leave a link to a good site that takes direct donations.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Xiaxue got ANOTHER nose job? + Fail article is FAIL.

 EDIT: A special hello to all of the butthurt minions that found my blog through the Michelle Phail Tumblr. Thanks for being evidence that "Phans" are massive hypocrites that don't read for shit. I now have AdSense. Go fucking crazy.

I'm late the party on this, I know.

The other day, one of my friends mentioned that Xiaxue got another nose job, and I laughed in her face. I honestly thought she was joking until I saw the post for myself.

I have never been a fan of XX, nor understood her popularity. She's another Paris Hilton as far as I'm concerned: Famous for nothing. 

Truthfully, I don't care what people do with their bodies, as long as they've actually put some thought into it. Physically, XX is a grown ass woman and she can do what she wants. Mentally, she acts like a severely butthurt 16 year old rebelling against the world. She is one of those "my way or the highway" people that can't accept that fans/haters on the internet have opinions, and are vicious as fuck because they are behind a monitor. I am no exception to this.

I honestly can't believe she has a fanbase. Especially after the whole "rape you with a bayonet" thing that she actually got fucking supported on. Her fans, as well as Michelle Phan, backed her up on that shit. That's so goddamn disgusting. I know sisterhood is pretty much dead, but wishing rape upon another is fucking filthy.

But back to the nose job...
I don't think XX will ever be happy with the way she looks. Ever. There was NOTHING wrong with how she looked before.

She looks stunning there. But for some reason, she felt the need to get 2 nose jobs, bleach her hair (poorly, I might add), bleach her brows to the point you can't see them, wear circle lenses almost all of the time, and obsess over other physical features of hers that don't really need to be altered. She looks fucking creepy.

 No one cares about your retainer but you.

One of my friends linked me to this garbage last night. Some how I missed it before. Probably because it's a load of stale turds.

In case you don't want to go to the page (it only contains two minion comments that are not lulzy), here's the short, oblivious article:

Ugly and unforgiving words were thrown but most were directed towards Michelle Phan.
Forums, especially the ones from GuruGossip, were hammering insults and banters on Michelle Phan's Disney Princesses video with Xiaxue. Xiaxue blogged on 2nd November on this debacle. Some called Michelle a hypocrite and scammer for making use of Xiaxue to stand up for her in her blog.
Xiaxue could not understand how Michelle could take these insults on a daily basis, but since they are also talking about her too, "I'm not gonna let them write s*** about me like that without fighting back!"
Xiaxue also mentioned in her post that her readers sent her countless links to these forums to warn her against doing a collaboration video with Michelle.
Apparently, PhanHaters existed even way before their collaborated video. Her haters actually took the trouble to create a tumblr account, name it "Michelle Phail" and blog about her on a regular basis.

Tsk Tsk. The things web celebrities go through...

Oh, dear god, Bianca Zen, do your research next time.

1. Guru Gossip is fucked. I already wrote about that. But no one should be surprised of the stuff that comes from that site. Not ever.

2. Michelle IS a hypocrite. And she's fucking filthy for standing up for XX in regards to the rape comment.

3. XX gets her fair share of shit, and just like Michelle, she practically asks for it. 

4. If Michelle wasn't able to "take these insults on a daily basis" she would have been off the internet a long ass time ago.

5. "Apparently, PhanHaters existed even way before their collaborated video." NO! REALLY? Jesus tap-dancing Christ do your fucking research, lady.

6. Don't be hatin' because the Tumblr is right and you are wrong.

7. "Tsk Tsk. The things web celebrities go through..." I hope this person is not considering a career in writing.

LOLrsk8s is an ass for getting me hooked on this show.

No, Linda Le, you are not a "geek".

***This isn't a post about Michelle Phan. It just mentions her.

Linda Le, AKA Vampy Bit Me, is a "model", and I guess a "writer". And apparently a "geek" and a"gamer". All that shit is in quotes because I think it's all a big load. The only thing she does for her modeling photos is dress up. She almost always wears the same make-up, same circle lenses, same lid tape, same mouth sort of open "teehee" look... Nothing unique. She's also been recognized as a cosplayer, which is bullshit because she doesn't make her own costumes, she is provided with them already made, and she has connections with professional photographers. Not far to the rest of the community.

As for being a "gamer", she's as much of a gamer as Michelle is, if that tells you anything.

 Who the fuck gets full blown dolled up to play a video game?

In case you are confused on the different types of gamers, please refer to this (click to enlarge):

Michelle and Linda are "GURL gamers".

Linda Le does the same thing when ever she posts pictures or videos involving games: You can tell her make-up is fresh and she picked out something to wear just for that. Usually a low-cut top and short-shorts. Look, I don't have anything against women with big boobs or tit jobs, but you don't have to show your cleavage all the damn time. I'm not saying nerdy, dorky, geeky, etc. girls have to be ugly, or can't be sexy. I know plenty of girl gamers that are pretty damn fine. But when you bring up some type of technological luxury, and you almost always attach a photo of yourself featuring your cleavage and fresh make-up, I'm just not fucking buying into it. Don't get all prettied up just to take a photo of yourself with a new game in the box or your new phone.

I don't believe that Linda just happens to always enjoy the most popular anime, games, manga, etc. She pretends to be a "jack of all trades, master of none", like Michelle, and it's annoying to no end. However, Linda, unlike Michelle, lacks a large female fanbase. I know plenty of models of different genres that have a large female fanbase. Probably because they don't sense any fake "look at me whoring myself out" shit. Michelle has a lot of people tricked, still occasionally makes make-up videos, and doesn't show off her cleavage as often, so of course girls might like her more. But I'm getting derailed.

I know a ton of men that are batshit for Linda, and I'm sick of hearing about her. I almost shat a brick when I was linked to this article.

I am sick and damn tired of these frames. They're not "geeky", they're not "hipster", 
they're to hold lenses to improve your goddamn eyesight.

Before I disagree with that crap, I'll start off by saying the obvious: Every woman is different.

1. Everyone has a different opinion of what is intelligent and fun talk. Example: LOLrsk8s enjoys talking about ichthyology and herpetology, I enjoy discussing microbiology. Do you think every woman enjoys hearing about that stuff? No. Do you think all women want what can be considered an "intelligent" conversation? No. Discover what she likes before talking about crap your are knowledgeable on, else you'll look like an asshole.

2. DON'T over compliment? That is dangerous advice. Some women love never-ending compliments. But again, every woman is different. Gotta find out what she likes.

3. Is Linda suggesting Googling the person to find out about them? That's fucked up. Before I was married I dated a guy that apparently Googled me, hellbent on finding sites I was on. Why didn't he just ask for my account names? ASK ABOUT THIS STUFF. QUESTIONS ARE A GOOD THING.

4. To an extent, yes, they will care what kind of car you drive. No one likes a rape van. More importantly, your driving better be safe.

5. I have never met a woman that enjoyed being beat in a video game. Especially one she favors. Don't make it a priority to win, asshole.

6. No shit, Sherlock. I'd put a picture here, but I used it already in my previous post.

Linda might be the most amazing person ever in real life. But I cannot stand her internet personality. I think she needs to do some modeling that requires different body language and facial expressions, and she needs to stop pretending to like every "nerdy" thing ever to come off as every man's dream come true. Men with even a lick of common sense won't buy into that shit. They may go, "Oh, look, boobs." and move on, but that's it. Or maybe that's what she wants.